Trusting in What You Can't Always See

Well..It's been a while. I have thought about writing several times, but never really got around to it. But the Lord was pressing on my heart this morning, to fight against the temptation to be lazy and put it off one more day. So here I am, hoping that someone will gain from my attempt to be transparent and serve the Lord with my words.

I was talking with a good friend that the Lord has blessed me with in this new season of my life, and a topic came up that has always been a struggle for both of us. Trust.

Trusting anyone really, with information, with stories you don't want to be repeated...but most importantly, trusting in the One that gives us our every breath.

Trust can be really easy when everything is going well. When money is stable, when your grades are good, when your family is happy with you..

but what about when all that fails? 

                            When it feels like no one is on your side?
                     That's when it's the hardest.

When you have to fall to your knees and give everything you hold to the Lord and fully trust.

I don't know about you, but that's not my first instinct. The first thing I want to do when everything goes down is lock myself away and have a pity party.

Party of one. No one else. You want to help me get out of my funk? Sorry, you weren't invited and I would rather be miserable alone.

THIS is where we go wrong. When God places people in our lives to help us and do life with us, and we shut them out because we're too grumpy to deal with our heart.

When we aren't trusting in the Lord, we don't usually trust anyone, we tend to turn into ourselves and only trust what comes from us. Which is really pointless, because, if we're honest, we don't really even trust ourselves to remember to turn the stove off before we leave the house, not to mention trusting ourselves to fix our own life. We just turn into selfish, self-seeking, miserable people.

In our own selfishness and pity we shut those out that love us the most, and it hurts.

But that's the amazing thing about our God, no matter how many times we fail and put our selfishness above all else, He still loves us and He still sent his Son to die for us-that's something that will never change. Even when everything in this world is changing and unreliable, HE is constant and HE is unfailing

"The Lord himself goes with you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8


It can be a constant battle for some. But we do have hope in ONE thing. The Lord is not finished with us yet.

Paul writes in Philippians 1 that "..I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."

We serve a loving and gracious God that knows our every thought and every plan for our future. And we can have hope in that, that can be found NOWHERE else. Not in man, not in security, not in possessions.

As easy as it is to turn inward and run to our favorite TV show or book to escape, that's only a temporary fix that will never satisfy our need for our Savior.

"Rid me of myself, I belong to you. Lead me to the cross."

I don't know about you, but when I'm trusting fully in the One who gave me life, I am a much happier person all around.

So this is my prayer for myself, and for whoever reads this and can relate, that the Lord would be the first place we run when things aren't really going our way. That He would be our comfort and that, in that, we would be able to love those around us and invite them into our hearts, working things out together, in love.

xKassiex

Wait. Hope. Pray. REPEAT.

While I was driving down the road the other day I turned on the radio to one of the christian radio stations and this song was on. Now this song is from the movie Fireproof, which most adults recoil at, noting its terrible acting and cheesy lines, but one of my best friends and I (hey Abby! ;)) actually really liked this movie.

Anyway, the lyrics to this song are, and always have been very convicting for me. The whole song is about waiting on the Lord BUT while waiting still serving and following and trusting Him. I don't know about you but that's hard for me. It's hard to trust and follow when you just really want to know when or how something is going to happen.

Right now I feel like my whole life is in waiting: school, this long, long-awaited adoption, my future career...

All of these are frustrating to be on this side of and not be able to see the finish line anywhere in sight.

As most of you know, we've been waiting to bring these children that we're adopting home for a very long time. But still we're waiting, sometimes not so patiently. I've finished a whole year of school but I'm still not even in the nursing program. And I need an education to start the career I would like....

"I will move ahead, bold and confident, taking every step in obedience. While I'm waiting."  Sometimes my heart can't really truly sing those lyrics and mean them, but it's something to work on.

While I'm worrying about my grades or what comes next in life, I need to stop and sit in the moment. The Lord has given me everything I need already, so why spend what he's given me on worrying?

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?" Matthew 5:25

I, we, have to remember that the Lord is our Strength, Provider, and only He knows what the future brings. And we need to trust that.

xKassiex

Back to the Blog

So it's been a while, I almost forgot I had a blog. I've been feeling led to start writing and sharing my thoughts again. I've made excuses, plenty of them, about how I don't have time and I don't have anything to write about..

But if I'm honest I'm just lazy and don't want to take the time to sit down and process what's going through my head. So here's to writing more about my life right now and what God's teaching me through this crazy time.

See you soon.

xKassiex